The past week I have found myself either deep in thought or very bored. I’ve been contemplating life a lot. Who I am, who I want to be, what I’ve done up until now, what I want to be or do moving forward.
I keep having this reoccurring thought that says, “What you are most afraid to do is exactly how you came here to shine.”
The next thought, “Well, I want to be of service as a healer and have a thriving business.”
Then, right on the back end of that sentence is, “You can’t do that. You aren’t good enough to truly help people.”
I can’t believe I still have this voice of self-doubt pop up, but it does leave my mind very quickly now and doesn’t carry much weight. I see this theme of “not good enough” as the main energy I came here to heal in this lifetime.
Looking back on my life so far it has become very clear I have shied away from being the full healer I came here to be. Every time I have learned a modality, earned a certificate, or degree and started a business I stopped myself shortly after it gets going. I have always felt that what I was doing was not enough and I let the self-doubt creep in. My expectations of myself in the past have always been ridiculously high. I have also always felt something was missing in each path I chose.
So how do I want to show up and share of myself moving forward? What is this missing piece?
I keep hearing this voice in my head saying “what you are most afraid to do is exactly how you came here to shine.”
As the theme of not being good enough is dissolving, my desire to be of service as the whole me is rising. I am a healer, always have been. I am realizing none of my gifts and talents as a healer are separate from the other. They were never meant to be separate businesses. As I have been spending more and more time in my oneness, connected to my heart, I see this is what was missing from every path I chose, connectedness. When I connect to the oneness there is no separate anything, all my gifts merge into one and I become an even more powerful healer, completely unique and authentic. Healing At The Heart is just that, it is coming back to the oneness of all, merging and harmonizing all the bodies... spiritual/mental/emotional/physical.
As soon as I pondered this idea of blending all my healing modalities the universe sent me a sign that I was on the right path.
I was listening to an integrative doctor and herbalist talk today about having a client who wasn’t responding to any treatments and actually having every significant side effect. After 4 years she said she has nothing left to offer and wished there was more research about why this might be happening. I instantly knew I could help her. I knew the help she needed was energetic in nature and that I could clear what was going on so her body could be receptive to healing.
As energetic spiritual beings in physical bodies, sometimes we need physical healing from physical modalities (nutrition, drugs, supplements, body work), and sometimes we need energy work to harmonize the body/mind/spirit and get things flowing again. I see now that I can switch back and forth between both ways of healing and combine it all. I can call upon my knowledge as a physical healer and my knowing as an intuitive healer to bring about exactly what the person is most needing.
This excites me, makes my soul sing, and also pushes right up against my comfort zone.
“What you are most afraid to do is exactly how you came here to shine.”
I think this statement is true for most of us if we are willing to listen.
The world is changing and so am I, so is everyone. It is time for all of us to look at what we are most afraid of and embrace all that we are. I’ve been more focused the past few years in developing my intuitive energetic healing gifts, but I still do functional nutrition consultations and healing plans on the side. I am taking an herbal medicine for women course right now as I feel the pull to connect with the Earth through my healer’s heart as well. I love science just as much as metaphysics. I couldn’t study one and not the other. It makes sense now as we are coming back to our oneness and wholeness as a people that I would feel like I can finally merge all my gifts together.
This is the thing I have been most afraid to do, yet I know this is the very thing I came here to do. I am a mystic who wanted to touch duality, to help people come home to themselves, heal their lives and see their own light.
I’m allowing the details of how I want to merge and shift Healing At The Heart come to be. This is truly an exciting time we are living in!
What makes your heart sing when you allow yourself to dream about it, get into the feeling of it? What if the fear was gone, how does this dream take shape?
Allow yourself to shine!
Love & Light,
Lexi
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